The Elder Scrolls Connection
by rubyanjel
Summary: Howard neglects another of his supposed responsibility and Leonard just don't know when to take a hint. Primarily, Shamy.


***Insert copyrights disclaimer about the show and Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim* Enjoy. It's my comeback after a long break from writing some fanfics. I'm getting a bit rusty but I just HAD to write something (ANYTHING) and see if I still got some fanfic juice in me.**

"It's not a silly dragon's game!"

"Yes it is! And I can't believe you'd rather play for four hours straight even if your stomach was ready to melt the rest of your digestive system."

"Hi guys." Penny greeted as Howard and Bernadette entered 4A. "Where's Raj?"

Howard pulled a chair and placed it next to the end of the couch, letting his wife sit before lying on the floor next to her. "He's out on a date with Lucy. Well, if he can coax her to even go out tonight."

"You're able remember Raj's schedule but you can't remember to defrost the chicken."

"I told you I was trying to fight against a herd of dragons." Howard defended himself as he reached for a box of Chinese food.

"Well, let's see you try to just fight a live chicken for dinner next time."

Sheldon, who simply can't help himself, interjected. "I seriously doubt Howard can slaughter a chicken, and I bet dollars to donut he cannot even perform the Kosher way."

Bernadette threw him a withering glance before taking her share of the night's meal being handed to her by Amy.

Everyone then settled and started to eat in an uncomfortable silence when Leonard spoke up. "Hey, Howard, how far into the game were you?"

Out of nowhere, Penny swatted Leonard's arm. Hard.

"Ow! What the hell was that for?"

"Really, Leonard?" Penny looked at him incredulously.

"What? What did I do?"

"You already know they've been arguing about it and you just had to make things worse."

"How is me asking for Howard's game status 'making things worse'?" He asked in a higher tone than necessary.

Penny stood up, towering her boyfriend. "Obviously Bernadette wanted the subject dropped and you should have just kept quiet."

Rubbing the affected arm, he asked. "But why did you need to hit me?"

"Because you're being stupid!"

He shook his head in disbelief. "I'm being stupid?"

"Yes, you can't just take a hint!"

"Oh, so the best way to give me cues is to hurt me?"

Placing an arm on her hips, she scolded. "Well, if you were not being numb of the situation, you wouldn't get hit in the first place!" And with that, Penny started walking towards the door.

"Where the hell are you going now?"

"Back to my apartment to get away from stupid boyfriends!" She said before slamming the door hard enough to break the hinges loose.

Sighing, he looked around the room noticing everyone's gaze is focused on him. "If anyone needs me I'll be eating in my room." He grabbed his half-eaten fried rice and walked towards his bedroom.

Silence once again filled the apartment. Howard could feel his wife's irritation by the way she would shot him a piercing look and then, she finally cracked.

"This is all your fault."

"My fault?"

"If you just start to live in the real world instead of focusing on those lousy video games none of this would have ever happen." She rose from her seat and walked towards the door. "I'm going to Penny's."

As the door closed behind Bernadette's departure, Howard saw Amy and Sheldon unfazed by the whole ramble. Sighing, he placed his empty food container on the coffee table and left the apartment.

In his spot, Sheldon seemed to be amused by the exchange of the couples. Leaning closer to Amy, who was sitting next to him and just finished her meal, he whispered, "I'm surprised, Amy. You did not mention a word through this whole debacle."

"Like you, I found the entire exchange really amusing."

"Care to explain how?"

"Well, ever since you tampered into my laptop and secretly installed a few of your game there –"

"It would be a shame if your Alienware wasn't put into its proper use."

"—which, by the way, took fifteen gigabytes of space and I thought it was infected with a virus,"

"You wouldn't have found out about it if you haven't asked me to check on your laptop."

"I got curious and tried to check and see what the fuss with these games was all about. Since then I found Elder Scrolls tolerable."

Sheldon raised an eyebrow. "Tolerable?"

"Well, yes, tolerable. The only problem I had with the game is the fact that it _is_ centered in a town that doesn't exist, and that there live among same continent are orcs, humans, and elves."

Sheldon was about to disagree with her last comment when she cut him off. "Although whenever I would recall and get frustrated over the fact that I was called unprofessional for flinging the monkey's poop back to him, oh how I wish I could just _Fus Ro Dah_ their asses off," she said with a hiss.

"Alright Amy, there's no need to impress me," he sat there, eyes wide. "Or scare me."

"Alright."

Both of them sat in their own comfortable silence before a shrill voice became louder and louder by the second.

"NO, THIS IS NOT JUST HOWARD'S FAULT. IT'S ALSO LEONARD'S FAULT!"

The door to the apartment opened with a force that makes them wonder how it has not collapsed yet. Bernadette was pulling a tipsy Penny towards Leonard's room. "LEONARD COME OUT HERE THIS INSTANT OR I WILL FORCE FEED YOU WITH SO MUCH DAIRY PRODUCT YOU'D WISH YOU WERE NEVER BORN."

"Bernie," came a panting Howard who was running after his raging wife. "Calm down. The neighbors are starting to wonder if there's a murder going on."

"OH I'LL COME DOWN. I'LL COME DOWN ONCE YOU MEN GET YOUR ASSES HERE THIS INSTANT AND SORT THIS SHIT YOU CREATED."

Leonard swung the door to his room open, and looking as if he was just awakened from a nightmare. "What the hell is going on?!"

From the living room, Sheldon and Amy continued to watch the scene unfold before them (well, by the other side of the apartment that is).

"Well, sucks to be those men. Like I said before, what in the world Howard saw in Bernadette, I will never understand."

"The fact that she is not grossed by all his sexual advances and that she was willing to marry him and have regular intercourse with him must be contributing factors."

"Ah, I see. It's the same for Leonard."

"Agreed. Although Penny's quite a catch herself."

"I seriously doubt that any proper man would think of her as what you just called a 'great catch'."

"That's my bestie you're talking about."

"Apologies. I'm merely stating facts."

"And how are those, 'facts'?"

"Obviously Leonard's inferiority complex has come into play when choosing his mate and that he chose someone whose characteristics and libido suits him well."

"Oh? And what does a proper man think as a great catch?" She raised her eyebrows, her curiosity getting the best of her.

"Of course, a proper man –such as myself—finds a great catch in the person who is just as superior as he is in terms of intelligence, aesthetics" he paused, smirking, "and shares his great love of monkeys."

Amy stared blankly at her boyfriend trying to process what he just said. _Did he just call be beautiful?_

"Did you just call me beautiful?"

He looked at her briefly before confirming, "Yes. I guess I did."

Amy looked as if she was about to cry. She knew Sheldon likes her for her mind, and that he tolerates how she looks like. This was the first time he ever mentioned how he felt about her appearance.

The look he saw on Amy's face made his heart flutter. She was smiling so genuinely and her eyes were glinting and sparking under the bright fluorescent light. It made him feel proud that he was able to get that kind of reaction out of her, his _woman_.

The two were looking at each other so _intimately_ and adoringly that their faces are now only a few inches apart. And in a heartbeat, Sheldon closed the gap that was separating them by placing his lips on hers.

"Oh, and since when did I made you stop playing all those games even when—"

Stomping back to the living room, Penny, Howard and Bernadette were greeted by the sight of Sheldon cupping Amy's face as they were kissing on the couch.

The voices startled the couple and both jumped away from each other as if they were being raided.

"HOLY FRACK WHAT JUST HAPPENED?"

"OH MY GOD."

"IT'S THE APOCALYPSE."

"What? What happened?" Leonard asked as he followed the three into the living room.

"It's… They were…" Penny struggled to formulate a complete sentence, clearly still stomped by the sight she had witnessed. Bernadette, on the other hand, continued to stare at the two as if she actually saw them having sex.

"The aliens were making out," was all Howard could let out.

"Wait? Seriously?"

The three nodded in unison.

Feeling her cheeks burning, Amy stood up and started to pick up her things. Sheldon, being awaken from both shock and humiliation, also stood up from his spot and pretended to look for what Amy was looking for. After reaching for her bag, she walked towards the door, with Sheldon following after her. The four continued to watch the two until they were out of the apartment.

"Well, that's something you don't see every day."

Sheldon and Amy walked down the stairs hurriedly towards the parking area as if someone was chasing them. Amy was just as shocked as those who caught them that her seemingly-asexual boyfriend has finally kissed her in his own volition, while Sheldon was just glad to be out of their proximity.

Once out of the building, the two slowed down as they approached Amy's car. They stood awkwardly beside the driver's side of the vehicle, clearly waiting for the other to make the first move.

"So, see you tomorrow at lunch?" He asked, giving a small smile.

Looking up deep into his eyes, she beamed. "Okay."

Another moment of eye-coitus has passed before Sheldon leaned down and gave her a sweet, chaste kiss.

As they broke off, Amy can't help but utter a small owl-like flutter. "Hoo!" She quickly covered her mouth, hoping to a deity that her boyfriend did not notice. Scrambling into the driver's seat, she briefly touched his hand and waved goodbye.

Sheldon, still shell-shocked with everything that has just transpired, watched as her car left the driveway turning towards the main street and into oblivion.

Shaking his head, he walked back to the doorway with a smirk on his face. "A proper man likes his woman chanting dragon summons."

**A/N: This was based from Momma Lio's (aka Lionne Lovegood) idea back in Fan Forum some threads ago. This is what I could remember from her idea. I hope I gave justice to her really awesome post that I can't find to save my life. I know it's kinda cheesy and corny. Forgive me. I am desperate to write something. Reviews are welcome. BE NICE. :P**

**P.S. I'll update some of my stories once I get over my anxiety and my thesis. Love lots.**


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